Hello blog world! I know it's been a while since I've written and in a minute, you'll understand why. Every year it seems, gets busier and busier and goes faster and faster. Every year starts fresh with promises of something better, but gets lost in the chaos and craziness that creeps in right around mid-October and never lets up as we go barreling toward the holidays. So, as we begin this new year, I want something new. Something different. Something fresh.
I've often had a "word" for each year. One year it was inspire. I wanted to inspire people. Inspire them with the things I said, what I did, how I lived my life. I wanted to inspire them to action and to be more than what they thought they could. Another year my word was intentional. I knew I needed to be more intentional with how I interacted with people, shared my faith, loved my family. This year, my word is margin. Yes, margin. I need lots more of it.
This past semester I was painfully reminded of how little margin I have in my life. I'm a planner, so looking at my calendar and seeing almost every day full of meetings, dinners, appointments, and other tasks brought me oh, so much joy! I'll admit it. I love to be busy! But I slowly started to notice something....the busier I became, the less joyful I was. Life became more about surviving, than really thriving. I wasn't living life, I was trying to just get through it. Is that the abundant life Jesus talked about coming to give us? I think not. I realized I was so busy doing things for God, that I wasn't taking any time to spend with God! I was seriously messed up. And I knew something had to change.
So, my new year's resolution or whatever you want to call it, is to create more margin in my life. What does this mean? Saying "no" more. Will this be hard for me? You better believe it. The last thing on earth this people-pleaser likes to say is the word "no." (Thankfully, the Lord graciously gave me a husband who recognizes my need to be needed and gently helps me find balance, even when I would rather not admit the world can function without my help.) I will say "no" to those things that someone else really can do. I will say "no" to the things that could be good things, but saying "yes" to them means saying "no" so something better. I will say "no" to the things that bring me stress and create frustration in life. And sometimes, I might just say "no" simply because I can.
Honestly, I'm looking forward to a life that is a little but simpler, less busy, and more joy-filled. I want time for those unexpected meetings the Lord might bring, moments when I can truly live life, enjoy my husband, reach some goals, and most importantly, seek the face of God. So, next time you see me, I give you permission to ask me how my margin is. And I dare you to make room in your life for it too.
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Christy You have never met me. Your Grandfather was the Paster of the church I attended at Second Baptist. I saw a reflection in your life that I have in my own. I want more than anything to please our Heavenly Father. I came to Houston to take care of a couple I love for 3 or 4 months but it has went into 4 years. I miss my own family so much and there are things I needed to teach my Grandchildren but couldn't. I have been waiting for some family to step up and take care of them but everyone is busy. Bro. Skip always taught us if you want something done ask a busy person to do it. LOL He is so very right. I love this Godly couple so much and being that I have the gift of servanthood it feels good inside to do for others. But much joy is being lost. I have no husband like you to recognise and support you when you have gone over the margerin. I have told the family that I am leaving the last week of April so they can make arrangements. But seeing the husband worry so breaks my heart. They have been married over 60 years and I want to have time for God and my family but don't want to feel responsible for this couple being separated if the family does not step up. She has been totally bed ridden for these 4 years. Unable to talk but I hear her ( In motions) and understand. There seems to be a loss of joy when you over extend your self and guilt for not feeling all the joy when you are doing something as unto the lord. In March/April I do not know how I can walk off knowing a nursing home will lay ahead for her. I have been making provisions so they will get help 5 hours a day 7 days a week it should help to keep her home. And her husbands meds only need to be fixed 1 time a month. We need a book or I do LOL ," How to overcome guilt of a servants heart". As it was stated earlier I love to serve and please Our Father but I am very tired and have too much trouble saying no. God Bless You Christy and its a joy to see how much you are like your grandparents and parents. Kuddos for your husband helping you to maintain your margerin.
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